Confession. I should have written part four of Darkness and Light by now. I haven't. I will, though, tomorrow. Worry not.
There are few things worse than idiots, and few hives of idiocy larger than the internet (The only larger one would be the government. Or maybe France). I have seen an example of idiocy today on the internet that surpasses all other transgressions. Apparently, one can now lip-sing to music. Yes. Lip-sing. That makes no sense. All singing is done with lips, except in a few rare medical cases. The premise of lip-synching is synching lips with music.
Firefox says synching is not a word. I've decided it is.
Are you aware that there no longer needs to be a comma before the word and (or or) in lists? Apparently someone decided to change the rules of language. I refuse to comply.
Though I would like to change the rules of language. Imagine the fun to be had in switching the meanings of affect and effect. Just for a day, of course.
Remember, when you assume you are as sum e. Sum e is, of course, a sum that is very often right, but often embarrassingly wrong.
Today I wrote a poem and received two meals for it. Does that make me a professional?
Yes.
Yggdrasil. I had a sonnet idea earlier, but now it has faded like mist.
I've less than an idea of where to go with my next sonnet. After VIII and IX, which you will see in due course, I simply don't know where to turn.
What follows is a line-by-line sonnet thought process. The first line is my thoughts during the first line, etc.
This is a good idea. I'm such a poet, and I didn't even know- no.
Yes, that's the perfect- Cthulhu take it, that's trimeter. Am I writing in ballad meter? Ugh.
The meters right and- wait, it needs to rhyme. What? How can I rhyme- oh, like that.
And that means I can write this.
Now what? That's really all there is. Well, I guess I can do this.
Iambs, why must you persecute me so? I only wish to give you form.
This is easy. I can say- Azathoth's madness! I already used that word.
And that rhyme. Let's just rewrite that, hm?
Finally, now I- no wait. I'm in the final quatrain, not the couplet.
Wait, this is easy.
Hah, I can rhyme with that.
And that! There's so much I can say now!
First I'll- Alhazarad's scribbles, I'm almost done.
Of course. Now I can't wield the meter or find a rhyme.
Father forgive me for I have sinned. I have used not one but three exclamations in my writing.
My damnation is certain.
It would be far more propitious if they've constructed me a dark palace from which to rule the hearts of the wicked from beyond the grave.
Andrew Lloyd Webber has some odd music.
I am memorizing the lyrics to Nyarlathotep. As you know, they are entirely in Middle Egyption. This will go nicely with Dragostea Din Tei, Caramell Dansen, and Re Vos Cerveaux.
What would happen if you took a syringe of gasoline, injected it into someone's eye, and put out your cigarette in that eye?
Good times.
Could you inject an eye with enough air to make it explode?
By reading this, you forfeit your soul to me.
And lose the game.
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"There are few things worse than idiots, and few hives of idiocy larger than the internet (The only larger one would be the government. Or maybe France)."
ReplyDeleteYou pwn... this is going under my favorite quotes.
I agree, I love the government joke as well. I hope I wrote that sentence correctly.
ReplyDeleteYou combined two independent clauses with a comma.
ReplyDeleteUse a semicolon!
ReplyDeleteI didn't want to say that.
ReplyDeleteWould you stop bashing the French, please? You're right, though, Andrew Lloyd Webber does have odd music.
ReplyDeleteYou're late to the scene.
ReplyDeleteI will never cease my harassment of the oddly scented.
What's wrong with bashing the French?
ReplyDeleteIt's racist and unkind. It's like saying all Native Americans own casinos and live off government handouts. Please don't, Reogan.
ReplyDeleteSee, what you just wrote is hateful and ignorant. All my comments are firmly grounded in fact.
ReplyDeleteImpolite, smelly fact.
Do I smell? I'm partially French. (Which is the reason this is bugging me a little more than normal.)
ReplyDeleteNo comment!
ReplyDeleteDo YOU smell?
ReplyDeleteOf course I do. All my senses work fine, including my acute olfactory.
ReplyDeleteDo you smell bad? (And shouldn't that be "all my senses work well?")
ReplyDeleteFine is rapidly becoming an adverb, which is one of the few lingual shifts I encourage.
ReplyDeleteI believe we both know my odor, assuming I have one, is masked by my spell components and clinging incense.
You're impossible!
ReplyDeleteMerely highly improbable.
ReplyDelete